You Didn't Really Love Me

Told you i was unattractive...

2005-01-29T20:26:09Z

bondageextasy @ 2004-11-25T03:09:00

2004-11-25T08:10:28Z

hey guys, i've gotten a new journal, one i can actually update without fear of my parents finding anything i dont want them to know about. please add http://www.livejournal.com/~loveunknown so i can have my buddies back. ^_^ i miss every body, certain people more ^_^

Amber

bondageextasy @ 2004-09-26T14:06:00

2004-09-26T18:04:35Z

hello people, long time no update, but life for while has sucked.
i got my heart stomped all over, TWICE and i think i may have hurt crickett, and i do believe Ryan is with Sarah. could life get any worse than this?

Amber

Good stuff tho: All Bs and Cs for me

bondageextasy @ 2004-08-05T18:16:00

2004-08-05T22:21:24Z

I AM 66% GOTH!

Oh My Goth! You Goth, Girl. There is a good chance I am bi. Freakiness pumps through my viens, but I can still laugh at myself.

Take the GOTH test at Fuali.com

Anyone read what is says? I could be bi, lol

bondageexasy

Amber

bondageextasy @ 2004-08-04T15:36:00

2004-08-04T19:38:10Z

I got my 4th period class changed today when i went up to Central.

1st semester: Creative Writing with Mr. Pinion YAYAY!!
2nd semester: Bible History????? wtf???

I ahte school sometimes, but this means i ahve 1st lunch. ^_^

Amber

My party

2004-08-03T21:03:16Z

I think Sunday was the best day of my life!!! First off, i dyed my hair, it's really dark, almost black. it was supposed to be a medium ash brown, but ya know, lol. I think everyone liked it, they said they did. I dont know how to put pictures on here, Blake, do you?

Everyone but Michael showed up *he got lost lol*, and everyone looked great. Sharon showed up first, an hour and a half early, lol and she made me these nifty earrings out of beer tops and coke tabs, lol Then Ayla, she gave me money, she was so cute ,in al black and white. It was funny, b/c she was play hitting on me and Cricketts brother thought it was funny, lol. Crickett of course came, and his brother, and they brought a friend, his name was Blake also. GINA CAME!! YAY! Then Edward and Chris came, both soprting money, lol and Eddie didn't get me any fortune cookies, the meany. Blake and Andrea were next to come *MORE MONEY* and Blake and Sharon gave me a bracelet with mini handcuffs attached. I love it. Coleman was their and he gave me a finger ring, which i love. Two ex's were their, Randy and BJ, which was uncomfortable. I dont think BJ liked Crickett so much, lol. Randy's brother JAmes, and his sister and her boyfriend, Nicole and Toby were there, and Hunter, Coty and Chelby. Their were only supposed to be 10 people, lol what happened? We had felle minion *can't spell it* and ribeyes. I love meat, lol.

Ayla and Crickett's brother jesse hit it off immediately, which i told him they would. And Andrea and Blake hit it off *crickett's friend* And Blake had an old crush come back and hit him hard. *sigh* Love was in the air. I sang, Sharon sang and did an AMAZING job, and Blake sang , it was damned amusing. Then i had ot leave, and i cried because Crickett was leaving the next day. I miss him already. he drew me a picture, it's cute.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On another note, school starts on Monday. I got my schedule in the mail yesturday and i'm excited though i have to get a schedule change:

1st period: Biology (1st semester)
1st period: Intro. to Humanities (2nd)
2nd period: World Studies (all year)
3rd period: Dirested Studies
4th period: ROTC 2, which i'm getting changed b/c i want ART!!
5th period: Algebra 2 (1st)
5th period: Guitar (2nd)

*sigh* can't wait.

Amber

If only....

2004-07-31T20:08:47Z

Your Love Situation by Amberishjewel
Username?
Your Love Is...	Rough
During Lovemaking You Act...	Like a child, always playing
Your Partner Is...	Your slave
Your Partner Has Said That You...	Are their only love
Your Love is Summed Up In A Quote.	"One must know how to seduce"

Quiz created with MemeGen!

bondageextasy @ 2004-07-30T16:24:00

2004-07-30T20:25:11Z

i'm back everybody! MY family and i went to Tunica, so they could gamble and my siblings and i could just sit around lol. Sorry to all those i didn't have a way of letting know i was leaving. Email me everyone, and catch me up on current events.

Amber

CDs i want lol

2004-07-22T15:43:03Z

Front Line Assembly 'Flavour of the Weak'
Crossfade "Crossfade'
Earshot "Two"
VAST "Visual Audio Sensory Theater"
VAST "Music for People"
Breaking Benjamin "We Are Not Alone"
Depeche Mode "Single of 86-98"
Depeche Mode "Singles of 81-85"
Nickelback "The Long Road"

HATE

2004-07-22T14:57:27Z

I absolutely hate, hate, HATE drugs. I hate that some of my friends do it, i hate that those people i love do them, like my brother. I hate any and all forms of drugs. I hated them even before I ever gave myself a real reason to hate them. Remember the abusive ex? He did drugs and then hed hit me, and i decided it was their fault. I don't understand why anyone would waste their money on that shit. ANy of my friends that do drugs, and are coming to my party, could you come straight? Please?

bondageextasy @ 2004-07-20T17:31:00

2004-07-20T21:38:21Z

A tingling has of late taken up residance in my heart. It doesn't hurt, it's actually quite welcome. It's not just in my heart either. i feel it in my tummy, and i feel it my mind. lol From the top of my head to the soles of my feet. It's a tingling that won't go away, not that i want it to. It's something i felt before, but not the this extent and I'm inclined to believe this is the real thing. Love. Pure, untainted, and unrestrained love. I think I'm enjoying this. But you know what I've been through my friends, I'm extremely afraid to trust all this. So many people have lied to me and mislead me. Though I'm quite thoroughly on love, I'm afraid, but maybe that is natural, i was never afraid before, so maybe that wasn't real? What i feel now is intoxicating. I wake up tingling, thinking of him, I walking around smiling, thinking of him, and i go to sleep, imagining him. It is love, it is obsession, and i like it.

Amber

bondageextasy @ 2004-07-20T15:22:00

2004-07-20T19:23:19Z

I am the Siren

A man is often secretly oppressed by the role he has to play - by always having to be responsible, in control, and rational. The Siren is the ultimate male fantasy figure because she offers a total release form the limitations of his life. In her presence, which is always heightened and sexually charged, the male feels transported to a realm of pure pleasure. In a world where women are often too timid to project such an image, learn to take control of the male libido by embodying his fantasy.

Symbol: Water. The song of the Siren is liquid and enticing, and the Siren herself is fluid and ungraspable. Like the sea, the Siren lures you with the promise of infinite adventure and pleasure. Forgetting past and future, men follow her far out to sea, where they drown.

What Type of Seducer are You?
created by polite_society </p>

bondageextasy @ 2004-07-18T14:35:00

2004-07-18T18:37:07Z

For everyone wondering why i haven't called, On Friday, my mom had to go to the hospital b/c she was having what she and evryone believes to be a stroke. The doctors can't tell her whats wrong or whats happening to her, but she had EVERY, SINGLE sign of stroke. I'm sorry, but i was worried about my mom and was unable to call anyone. have the worries htough, she's better now.

Amber

bondageextasy @ 2004-07-16T17:07:00

2004-07-16T21:09:38Z

My Gemomtry teacher last year, 1st semester, and a friend, b/c she was so awesome, Mrs. kelley Horton, died yesturday is a car accident, leaving her baby and her husband, who was going to Iraq, but isn't now. That sucks so incredibly much! OMG, i loved mrs horton, she was so nice and friendly and she helped us with our fund raisers.....

That sucks so much...

Amber

bondageextasy @ 2004-07-09T17:52:00

2004-07-09T21:54:01Z

I wish i was beautiful, the kind of beauty that puts both women and men on their asses. Though it doesn't have to be like perfection, i jsut want for once in my life to be looked at and have someone say 'wow'

Amber

AUGUST:
Loves to joke. Attractive. Suave and caring. Brave
and fearless.
Firm and has leadership qualities. Knows how to
console others. Too generous
and egoistic. Takes high pride of oneself. Thirsty
for praises.
Extraordinary spirit. Easily angered. Angry when
provoked. Easily jealous.
Observant. Careful and cautious. Thinks quickly.
Independent thoughts. Loves
to lead and to be led. Loves to dream. Talented in
the arts, music and
defense. Sensitive but not petty. Poor resistance
against illnesses. Learns
to relax. Hasty and trusty. Romantic. Loving and
caring. Loves to make
friends .

What does your birth month say about you?
brought to you by Quizilla

bondageextasy @ 2004-07-07T16:11:00

2004-07-07T20:14:55Z

It's been a rather interesting week. I've been practicing Italian, as it's not my first language and I think I'm rather good at it now. My parents have been oddly nice to me, except for when I'm not listening when they think i should be. I'm also broke, which hardly ever happens to me, which means i can't buy my book 'Dark Destiny' by Chrintine Feehan, which ive bene waiting on for awhile.. But all in all, i'm quite HAPPY.

Amber

Are D's medium?

2004-07-06T17:08:10Z

Take the quiz: "What do your anime breasts look like, eh?"

Nicely Medium
You're nicely medium... You're not embarassingly small or painfully big. Don't change yourself, unless you're a masochist. Then it's okay, I guess.

Awe...

2004-07-05T16:27:18Z

Your love is... by ChibiMarronchan
Your name is...
Your kiss is...	delicious
Your hugs are...	warm
Your eyes...	burn into my heart
Your touch is...	awakening my heart
Your smell is...	exotic
Your smile is...	amazing
Your love is...	unique

Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

Bondageextasy's LJ stalker is xpendragonx!

xpendragonx is stalking you because they think you are the one who made anonymous abusive LJ comments. They are also eating your food when you aren't looking!

LJ Stalker Finder
From Go-Quiz.com

Me??

2004-07-04T20:40:06Z

Take the quiz: "What Kind of Pervert are You?"

The Seductive Pervert
The Seductive Pervert: You are The Seductive Pervert, you don't have to try! You use only your body and sexual ways to lure someone in an endless dream of sexual fantasies. Although you may use toys, you have your desires, you seem to know what gets to them, you even know their soft spots, woah, wouldn't matter if they had first met you or not! Your ways are unbelievable and quite sensual, you could probably lay anyone you wanted with the way you speak, move, or just motion. Just don't test your abilities on yourself, you might find yourself attracted to even your own body. Let's try attracting another person instead. Hehe!

Take the quiz: "What Is Your Kink?"

Domination
You are most comfortable when in control. Having someone at your beck and call makes you hot. You can be very demanding, and expect perfection! In the bedroom, you take charge. Your motto is It's My way or the highway!

I'm INFP?

2004-06-24T22:23:58Z

Your personality type is INFP.

Introverted (I) 71% Extraverted (E) 29%
Intuitive (N) 73% Sensing (S) 27%
Feeling (F) 60% Thinking (T) 40%
Perceiving (P) 64% Judging (J) 36%

fathom....

2004-06-24T21:57:20Z

Last night i went to Club Fathom and it was the awesomest thing ever.

THREE DAYS GRACE was there, omg it was awesome.

the first band that played was INSTRUCTION which was awesome the dude was hott, the music rocked and i even bought a tee-shirt of theirs so i got to meet the lead singer dude *sigh*

then THORNLEY played and they were a little softer, but they still kicked ass.

then three days grace played, and it rocked. but this bitch kept sitting on this guys shoulders and i had to move because i couldn't see through her fat ass, she almost got pushed over if she hadnt moved when she had. it was the best night ever, and laci wasn't there, we looked but she wasn't. I was also told by a friend of hers that she has a girlfriend, i dont think ive ever been more shocked.

I'm so happy right now i could explode and life is good.

Amber

bondageextasy @ 2004-06-22T14:46:00

2004-06-22T18:49:19Z

well my brother brandon came home from Japan for a paternity test, it's his, and he's beautiful.

I'm so happy right now i could explode. Crickett is awesome.

My brother's b-day was the 13th
Laci's b-day was the 14th
My sister's b-day was the 18th
and Chelby's b-day was the 19th

Crickett's is the 26th, he'll be 18, damn, lol

School starts on August 9th, and for some reason i can't wait.

Amber

Love this song

2004-05-24T20:18:54Z

Looking back at me i see that i never really got it right
i never stopped to think of you
i'm always wrapped up in things i cannot win
you are the antidote that gets me by
something strong like a drug that gets me high

what i really meant to say
is i'm sorry for the way i am
i never meant to be so cold
i never meant to be so cold
what i really meant to say
is i'm sorry for the way i am
i never meant to be so cold
i never meant to be so cold

to you i'm sorry about all the lies
maybe in a different light
you could see me stand on my own again
cause now i can't see
you are the antidote that got me by
something strong like a drug that got me high

what i really meant to say
is i'm sorry for the way i am
i never meant to be so cold
i never meant to be so cold
what i really meant to say
is i'm sorry for the way i am
i never meant to be so cold
i never meant to be so cold

i never meant to be so cold

i never really wanted you to see
the screwed up side of me that i keep
locked inside of me so deep
it always seems to get to me
i never really wanted you to know
so many things that you shouldn't have known
i guess for me there's just no hope
i never meant to be so cold

what i really meant to say
is i'm sorry for the way i am
i never meant to be so cold
i never meant to be so cold
what i really meant to say
is i'm sorry for the way i am
i never meant to be so cold
i never meant to be so cold

bondageextasy @ 2004-05-06T17:19:00

2004-05-06T21:20:44Z

Crickett, Samuel Eric Baker......*sigh*

I write alot more about him later.

JOSH!! email me damnit, lol

Amber

bondageextasy @ 2004-05-02T13:16:00

2004-05-02T17:17:11Z

Oh god, something is wrong, i dont understand, i think im going to be sick...

Amber